My name is Brittany AKA Brittxoxoz from Barely A Blog. I post about my journey through life, self-discovery, and mental health. I hope you can stop by and say hi! I am so excited to be a part of the guest post! Thank you for letting me be here to share my thoughts.
To begin, let me take you back to before I started blogging. I was a very bitter, unhappy, and negative person. I used to think that I was unlucky in life and everything wrong happened to me and only me. I used to get so upset over things I couldn’t control and would make myself so ill with grudges knotting my stomach. Every morning I would wake up and instantly start my day thinking about things that upset me from the past!? Not aware of how toxic that behavior was and how it was only making me fall deeper into my darkness. Days would go by, and I couldn’t “snap out of it.” I was stuck day after day, feeling unhappy with who I am and desperately wanting to change. But not sure how or where to start. It wasn’t until I read this book- Declutter Your Mind: How To Stop Worrying, Relieve Anxiety And Eliminating Negative Thinking By S.J. Scott & Barrie Davenport. This book opened a new world for me and helped me realize how my brain acts in its autopilot state and how to correct it when it goes negative. This book changed my life, many things have stuck with me through my journey, and I still use these methods as much as possible. Today I wanted to share the top three methods I use the most throughout my days.
Deep breathing and meditation
You may not pay much attention to your breathing and your posture, but by simply becoming more aware of how you breathe, you foster a calmer state of body and mind. I used to think meditation was strange, and people who practiced it were weird, but that was before I tried it myself. One day I was fed up with feeling emotions. I couldn’t stop my thoughts, and I couldn’t stop crying. I found this book and read the step-by-step tips on how to reach the quiet inside. It’s just like Deepak Chopra said, “Meditation is not a way of making your mind quiet. It’s a way of entering into the quiet that’s already there-buried under the 50,000 thoughts the average person thinks every day.” Meditation has allowed me to control my anger and helped me manage my emotions when I become upset. Some days I have to meditate more often throughout the days, to keep myself at peace. Other days, I can start my day with meditation and have the best days ever.
Challenge the negative thought and replace it
When you stop to watch the thoughts come and go in your head, they almost always are exaggerated, not true, or not the whole truth. In the book, they use the example, “I’m a loser, I can never do anything right.” They talk about how when we get these negative thoughts, they feel factual at the time. However, if you bring awareness to your thoughts, you’ll realize they are not true at all. To stop this cycle of overthinking, we challenge the thought with concrete examples that prove that it’s untrue by reminding ourselves of a previous “win,” or positive event. For me, I am very insecure. So I am constantly telling myself how worth it and beautiful and intelligent I am. Because I often and for so long have told myself the opposite.
Awareness is very important when practicing mindfulness, and is even more important when speaking mindfully. First, you should pay attention to the things you say to others and yourself. The book uses the idea of placing a mental filter between your thoughts and words. Words hurt no matter how tough a person is or thinks they are, and it’s important to speak in ways that are loving, compassionate, and respectful. Therefore, you should take a moment to choose your words carefully. You never know what other people have going on in their lives, and the more you speak mindfully, those around you will respond with kindness. I used to be the worst about throwing insults anytime I felt attacked. I wasn’t aware at the moment of the cruel words that came out of my mouth until I thought back and regretted them. People didn’t want to be around me because I was so mean, and I was left feeling like shit for treating my loved ones shitty.
Nowadays, I am much more positive than I have ever been before. I’m more present and understanding with myself and others around me. I feel more confident in myself and with the things I do day-to-day. I still have TONS of work to do, but I can say for the first time I LOVE myself. I love everything about me and my mind inside and out. I am beautiful. I have this book to thank for helping me kick start my journey in realizing who I am. I always knew she was in there. I couldn’t see behind all the nonsense running free in my head.
Thank you again for the opportunity and time!
I hope if you’re reading this you have a wonderful day.